Episode 23 - "The One Where Rachel Has a Baby Part 1"
May 16, 2002
Rachel and Ross get to the hospital, they called from the cab and asked for a private room but they claim only semi-private rooms are all they have, so they have to use a semi-private room. The first couple that arrives on their room are Marc and Julie, who are having their third baby and are bemused when they see Ross in their bed wearing leg stirrups after first walking into the room, and watch in bewilderment as he struggles to get out of them and get off the bed. An initially embarrassed Ross tries to close the curtain, but they ask him to leave it open stating that they're "all in this together." They have a strangely enthustiastic attitude which bemuses Ross and Rachel, and Marc suddenly pulls out a camera and takes a picture of them. Marc and Julie also appear to be amused when they realize that Rachel just had a contraction at the same time as Julie did, and Marc irritates them by taking more pictures. Later Marc informs them that he's just felt how much Julie's cervix is dialated, and Julie suggests Ross do the same with Rachel. She even suggests that Ross feel hers too in order to compare.
Meanwhile, the other friends are bored to hell in the hospital. To have some fun, Monica wants to freak Chandler out. She tries to do that by saying that she wants a baby, but unexpectedly he thinks they're ready to have a baby, which freaks her out. She then tells them that she's ready to have a baby, but she wants Joey to be the father, which causes Joey to freak out, and Monica says that that reaction was all she was looking for. Judy arrives at the hospital, and has an unpleasant surprise for Ross; she wants him to marry Rachel and gives him her mother's engagement ring.
Marc and Julie have left the room to have their baby, which frustrates Rachel as she was there first. There are new people, who have some unusual nicknames for each other, including "Evil Bitch" and "Sick Bastard", and they keep fighting all the time. The woman appears to be in pain and deeply frustrated about it, and she keeps taking her anger out on her husband, accusing him of being a pervert who is leering at Rachel. He denies it, but then Ross catches him doing it and angrily threatens him, but the pained and frustrated woman apparently forgets that she'd earlier berated him for exactly the same thing and sticks up for her husband by insulting Ross. When they also leave before Rachel, a Chinese girl enters, who has very mild contractions and makes a very weird sound during that, humming and then squealing while looking concerned but not looking or sounding as if she is in pain, as if she can't feel any. Ross ends up closing the curtain in the middle of a conversation.
Chandler manages to convince Monica that they're ready to have a baby. After doing some quick "period math" Monica says they could even start trying right away. Monica and Chandler try to find a possible place to have sex right there in the hospital, but there's a bit of a problem; each time they think they've found a vacant room, nurses walk in and interrupt them.
Phoebe meets a cute guy in the elevator who broke his leg in a car accident. Just as he's going to tell her where he stays at the hospital, the door closes. With a little help from Joey, playing Drake Ramoray, she manages to find out what room he's in. At second glance, she's worried that he's just another in a long line of "stinkers" she's been attracting recently. She tricks Joey into playing Drake Ramoray again and asking him some very personal questions.
When after 17 hours and three people giving birth before her Rachel is still dialated only three centimeters, she can't take it anymore and sends the next one out of the room. When the nurse manages to let her accept another patient in her room, Ross and Rachel are stunned when the patient in question turns out to be none other than Janice. That also ruins the moment for Monica and Chandler, which are in the next room trying to conceive a baby and they hear Janice through the wall.
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